Often in the heat of living
\nI revisit the old question:
\nWho am I?<\/p>\n
Through the beautiful and the ugly of life,
\nThrough the joyful and the painful of life,
\nThrough the victory and the defeat of life,
\nThrough the probing of the cosmos,
\nThe one question that has remained unanswered is:
\nWho am I?<\/p>\n
Intuitively it seemed I should be one of the following:
\nA creation of God, who is passing through human form for the training for a higher state of being;
\nA highly evolved specimen of nature whose reach and grasp is wide and high,
\nWho can make a large difference in the quality of human life on earth;
\nA manifestation of God who has come to earth to do some specially great things;
\nAn agglomeration of experiences, ideas, desires, physical entity, and goals,
\nWhose viability depends on nature and chance;
\nA being which transcends human understanding.<\/p>\n
But I would not accept my intuition on its face value,
\nSo I set myself to answer this eternal question.
\nI went through the innermost recesses of my being,
\nI went through every event of my history I could remember,
\nI went through every pore of my body
\nAnd the minutest sensation I could fathom.
\nI went through every element of science I know,
\nI walked through all the religions that I have explored.
\nI also went through all the folklore and mythology that I have come across.
\nI roamed over all the literature I have absorbed.<\/p>\n
After my sweeping and penetrating quest that I made in search of myself,
\nI found that there was nothing like myself:
\nIt was a vast misunderstanding.
\nThe addiction of self is deeply pervasive.
\nI was shocked that the myth of self that I had been harboring
\nIn my bosom for all my life was the greatest illusion I have had.
\nWho am I?
\nNothing but a superficial worldly reference \u2013
\nIrrelevant to inner human life, irrelevant to cosmos.<\/p>\n
Suffern, New York, 1.15.10
\nRevised 1.31.10<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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